RV Life - Back Issues

Plan An Odyssey

No one likes to hear the dreaded “P” word when it comes to his or her life. None of us want to be described as predictable. But we’re getting boring, I’m afraid. We work, piddle about the house, sleep, repeat. At some point, the leisure time that is supposed to help define us got stale as well. I’m talking about all those safe little RV trips to the same old places. It’s the way we limit ourselves to the same handful of RV resorts and campgrounds, taking the same roads to get there, eating at the same restaurants along the way. If opting for the Shell gas station over Amoco is your idea of variety, we’d better talk. Makes me yawn just thinking about it. You, too?

Let’s shake things up a little—or a lot, if the most exciting thing you’ve done lately is the New York Times crossword puzzle. You with me? No matter if you’re a retiree with all the time in the world or a working stiff limited to two weeks off a year (and a predictably uncompromising boss), it’s no matter. Time is not the problem here. Let’s start with a vow not to use a lack of vacation time as an excuse. It’s that kind of thinking that keeps us in the same-old, same-old. No, this year we’re going to undertake an odyssey. A thousand years or so ago, we might have called this a “quest,” but we’re leaving the chain mail at home and swapping horses for your trusty RV. No, this year we’re going to broaden some serious horizons.

It all begins with a couple of simple questions. Where do you want to go that you’ve never been? What would you like to do that you’ve never done? This is not the time to be safe or rational. Leave reason and logic outside for a bit. What’s it going to be? Modesty is for monks. Push yourself. Here are a few thoughts to mix those stagnant mind juices:

• Take a summer and hit every major league baseball park. Come on, there’s only 30 of them (although I don’t know if the Tampa Bay Devil Rays even count at this point). Too much? OK, how about taking 10 days and watching a game at every National League Central ballpark, starting with incomparable Wrigley Field?

• Pack the corkscrew and make a slow pour through California’s wine country. The one rule is that you must sample the local vintages freely—and bring some back for me.

• Is there any reason a Civil War buff like you hasn’t toured Gettysburg, Manassas, Bull Run, Antietam, Shiloh and Appomattox? You could cover this collection of hallowed grounds even in a short vacation.

• One word: Alaska.

• So you like roller coasters, do you? Are you a wood coaster purist or relish any ride capable of rearranging your equilibrium for a few hours? Then why aren’t you out there testing those G-forces? Run the gamut of amusement parks to find the best of the bunch. I’m guessing your kids won’t mind tagging along on this one.

• Is all this too tame? Is the blood pumping now? How about RVing Europe. Pick a favorite country or throw away the guidebooks and see it all. Rent an RV upon arrival, join a guide-led caravan, or sail your rig over for the ultimate bragging tale.

• Quick, name five national parks you’re embarrassed you haven’t seen. There, I just planned your summer vacation.

• Are you telling me you’ve never driven Route 66? You must correct this immediately!
• Follow the NASCAR tour for a while. And by this, I mean, do it all. Park in the infield, throw a couple of plastic lawn chairs on top of the roof, and deck out your RV to celebrate a favorite driver.

• Let your stomach lead the way. Arrange stops at the World Championship Chili Cookoff (Las Vegas), Great American Beer Festival (Denver), or BBQ World Championships (Memphis). Eat and drink heartily. Repeat.

Hopefully, you’ve got some ideas of your own. I’d bet cash money there’s a few ideas harbored in your brain, just looking for a way out. Let ‘em flow, people. Let ‘em flow.